The Student News Site of Walt Whitman High School

The Black and White

The Student News Site of Walt Whitman High School

The Black and White

The Student News Site of Walt Whitman High School

The Black and White

Every song on Taylor Swift’s “The Tortured Poets Department” ranked
Softball narrowly defeats Blair 12–11
Tennis demolishes BCC in Battle of Bethesda
Boys volleyball takes down Seneca Valley 3–1
Boys lacrosse crushes Springbrook 18–2
The Black and White’s Washington Commanders mock draft

The Black and White’s Washington Commanders mock draft

April 25, 2024

‘Battleship’ sinks with absurd plot, weak acting

Recent summer blockbusters lit up the silver screen with superheroes from Batman and Spiderman to the Green Hornet. But 2012 brings us a new type of action flick: “Battleship,” based on the popular board game of the same name.

The poor acting and extraneous visual effects in "Battleship" made this movie a sinker. Photo courtesy Universal Pictures.

While many of these superhero films succeeded with both moviegoers and the critics, “Battleship” strikes out with a clichéd script and an awful storyline. Director Peter Berg, who is best known for “Hancock” and the TV series “Friday Night Lights,” takes viewers on a predictable ride through an alien takeover, filled with one-sided acting and mind-boggling visual effects.

The movie begins with a scene straight out of a corny commercial, in which Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch) robs a convenience store to impress an attractive girl he meets in a bar (Brooklyn Decker). During the scene after his arrest, he’s with the girl and suddenly has a legitimate job in the Navy, with no explanation of how he suddenly succeeded.

Story continues below advertisement

The movie becomes a conventional action flick with the unsung hero, Hopper, attempting to save his ship (and the world!) from aliens by confronting multiple ridiculous tasks like coming up with a way to track the aliens’ vessel without a functional radar.

Despite previews suggesting Liam Neeson and co-star Rihanna play the lead roles, they both had minor roles compared to young gun Kitsch. Neeson’s role as the stern and demanding father of Decker is almost laughable, as he seems to be trying too hard to fulfill the role.

The alien conflict that threatens a “near extinction event” doesn’t even hit the screen for close to an hour, and when it does, the overly dramatic Navy officers never seem to figure out what to do to stop the aliens.

The movie does, however, find a way to show off an overload of special effects like flying, automated missile-launching alien ships and rolling spheres that destroy everything in their path. Though the half-billion dollar budget allows for eye-popping visual effects, the effects often compromise the integrity of the movie.

The end of the movie leaves the viewer wondering what the connection is between the live-action movie and the classic board game. The only obvious similarity is a two-minute sequence with a similar looking grid of the ocean, which makes no sense to anyone except those who enjoy overly dramatic alien invasion movies.

Berg could have taken the timeless strategy game and created a true action spin-off. Instead, the movie follows the course of all conventional sci-fi’s and leaves viewers laughing at the absurd plot twists. It’s not exactly what Berg hoped for, but it will still make millions in the box office as a below-average, over-the-top summer action movie.

View Comments (6)
More to Discover

Comments (6)

In order to make the Black & White online a safe and secure public forum for members of the community to express their opinions, we read all comments before publishing them. No comments with personal attacks, advertisements, nonsense, defamatory or derogatory rhetoric, excessive obscenities, libel or slander will be published. Comments are meant to spur discussion about the content and/or topic of an article. Please use your real name when commenting.
Comments are Closed.
All The Black and White Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest
  • J

    Justin LeeJun 4, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    What would be worse, this movie or a movie about the game Yahtzee?

  • C

    C.NuckJun 1, 2012 at 10:52 am

    Come on man, if you go into this with the mindset that it’s just a mindless action flick about the Navy fighting aliens and enjoy it for what it’s actually trying to be it’s pretty darn good. Seems like you went in expecting ‘Citizen Kane’ or the ‘Godfather’ not explosions for an hour and a half with a tint of Navy recruting.
    Now, with Hasbro making live version movies of their toys, where’s my ‘My Little Pony’ movie with Bruce Willis or Samuel L. Jackson?

  • J

    John doeJun 1, 2012 at 10:45 am

    yes but this is not suposed to be a good movie and no one expected it to be because how does one base a movie on a board game. and Rhianna really doesn’t have that big a part of it, Peter MacNicol plays almost as big a role but no one knows who he is but me.

  • G

    gramma nasiMay 31, 2012 at 1:39 pm

    Goes on DVD not cose on dvd, better yet whan it gets out on DVD. Also don’t start sentances with and, but if you must capitalize it.

  • C

    CM PunkMay 31, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    I feel like going to this movie would of been justified if Liam Neeson had said “They sunk our Battleship”. In all honesty though, there were so many better, more sensible ways they could of used the property: Naval Combat film, Call of Duty on a boat, comment on naval warfare, WW2 movie etc. but they decided to make it an alien invasion film starring Rhianna.

  • J

    John doeMay 31, 2012 at 10:40 am

    What are you talking about this movie gives just what you want from it. if your actually ecxpecting a plot wait for somethign like prometheus or the dark knight rises. I went to see this movie with some friends and it is definetly one for the theatres not to get when it coes on dvd though. also if you do decide to see it find the courage to yell out random battleship board game style cordinates every time they launch a torpedo missle ect. and then hit or miss depending if it hits or misses.